Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
