Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
