Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
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