A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just took my morning after pill in the library
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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