I got chris browned last night
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
