when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I think I have vodka in my lungs
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
