Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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