you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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