My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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