You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I love you. Go after that dick
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
