is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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