Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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