Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
