Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
