I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize