i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
