And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
