That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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