lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Randomize
