New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
