Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
