Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
