Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
