you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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