that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
