Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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