i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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