If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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