just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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