He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
