U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
do herpes really smell.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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