no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
