is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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