Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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