Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
