You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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