We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
