I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize