We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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