dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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