Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
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