I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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