Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
