Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
