her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
