Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
