My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
