Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Randomize