Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
