that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize